Your Love is Strong

Easter Sunday was yesterday here is Australia. It was my first Easter away from home and it was a tough one. I woke up happy but the dreary weather quickly put a damper on my mood. Katie and I walked to church but it just didn't feel right. Going to church felt right, but not going to my church didn't feel right, it didn't feel like home. I didn't have a delicious dinner to look forward to. All I could think of was my lean cuisine sitting in the freezer and how it would probably be the extent of my Easter dinner. Suddenly, I missed home the most since I've been here. I don't think you realize how valuable friends and family are on holidays until you don't have them there. Katie and I were going to go to an Easter art show but I was just not in an emotional state to go out. I sat in my room, feeling pretty lonely and depressed. I tried to nap but my mind wouldn't stop racing. Sweet Katie sent me a text saying she left something for me downstairs so once I mustered up the energy I headed down there. On every stair step there was a chocolate egg trailing to my makeshift Easter basket filled with an assortment of candy. It definitely brightened my mood but still didn't take away the loneliness I felt. After awhile I invited Katie back over and I made us some spaghetti and we watched Ratatouille. Though it didn't feel Easter-esque it was still enjoyable. When I woke up this morning and checked facebook, everyone's statuses were about Easter and all of a sudden it felt like Easter. Almost as if I couldn't celebrate Easter until my friends and family back home could too. So to me, today is Easter and I am definitely okay with that. I ate a chocolate bunny for breakfast and listened to some music to have my own little Easter celebration. One of the songs I listened to was "Your Love is Strong" by Jon Foreman and I ended up putting it on repeat. What a wonderful message. Thanks Jon, and thank you Jesus for your strong love and what you gave up for my sake.

Heavenly Father, you always amaze me
Let your kingdom come in my world and in my life
Give me the food I need to live through today and
Forgive me as I forgive the people that wrong me
Lead me far from temptation
Deliver me from the evil one

I look out the window the birds are composing
Not a note is out of tune or out of place
I walk to the meadow and stare at the flowers
Better dressed than any girl on her wedding day

So why do I worry?
Why do I freak out?
God knows what I need
You know what I need

Your love is
Your love is
Your love is strong

The kingdom of the heavens is now advancing
Invade my heart, invade this broken town
The kingdom of the Heavens is buried treasure
Would you sell yourself to buy the one you've found?

Two things you told me
That you are strong
And you love me
Yes, you love me

Your love is
Your love is
Your love is strong

Our God in Heaven
Hallowed be thy name
Above all names
Your kingdom come
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven
Give us today our daily bread
Forgive us weary sinners
Keep us far away from our vices
And deliver us from these prisons

2 weeks.

I can't even believe I leave in two weeks. My flight leaves Portland at 1 o'clock on February 10th. That is ridiculously soon! My mind has been very distracted the last few days due to my mom being extremely ill with meningitis and in the hospital. I'm pretty behind on packing and getting the things I need, but life happens and family is a priority. I'm so thankful for all the people who have been praying for my mom. I am a strong believer that prayer can be very powerful and I am so blessed with people in my life who are so willing to pray for my family. I think it made a big difference.

Despite the craziness that has been going on this week I have so much to be thankful for, especially financially. I was so concerned about money the beginning of December. No matter how I calculated it I kept coming up really short for the trip. I was so worried I wouldn't have enough money so I started working 60 hour weeks to try to make up the difference. But alas, God started pulling some strings and providing for me. The school in Australia (who refused to allow me to pay tuition in two payments) randomly sent me an email allowing me to do so, my scholarship pushed some money forward so I wouldn't arrive in Australia empty handed, and a couple amazingly generous people have surprised me with contributions to my trip. This just makes me realize how much I need to trust God and stop relying solely on myself. God won't necessarily provide for you directly, but he sure will indirectly, through other people.

Well, I'll be moving out of my apartment this weekend and then I have three more days left at work. I really like working at Fran's but it will be nice to move on. It's very bittersweet. I think I will miss the regular customers the most. I've worked there for two years and I've grown to love quite a few customers there. It'll be hard not seeing Craig and Janet on Monday nights, Cheryl most every night, talking to Bill while I make his ridiculously hot latte, seeing the cute couples that come in regularly, and all the other familiar, friendly faces that made working long shifts so much easier. I will also miss my girls so much. My co-worker, and good friend Eva is throwing me a going away party this Sunday which will be really fun. It'll be nice to have one last day with all the girls. I feel like time is running out so quickly and I have so many people I want to spend time with before I leave! I really hope I get to see everyone I want to see!

Layla (1994-2009)

My companion of 15 years passed away yesterday. For those who haven't experienced the unconditional love of a dog or haven't yet experienced the loss of one, it's hard to understand. Her life was no less important than any other member of my family. I can barely remember life before Layla. She's always been there and no matter how we treated her or how frustrated we got, she loved us so unconditionally. I truly believe that God and dogs are the only ones who understand what true faithfulness and unconditional love is. It's been a rough two days filled with so many tears. I would give anything to have one more day with her. But I know it wouldn't matter because I want her every day after that. The bible doesn't seem very clear on the topic of if animals go to heaven or not but I know that heaven will be filled with everything that brings joy to my life. I can't imagine God not reuniting us again. But I also, unlike a lot of people, believe that dogs have souls. You can disagree with me, but my heart isn't going to change.

"For those who love dogs, it would be the worst form of a lie to call any place where dogs were banned 'Paradise.' Certainly no loving God would separate people from their canine friends for eternity"

-Stanley Coren, dog psychologist

P.S. I know it's been almost 2 months since I last posted. It's been a couple months filled with more chaos than I can even explain. But I'm back.

These photos of Layla were taken this last June...