Your Love is Strong

Easter Sunday was yesterday here is Australia. It was my first Easter away from home and it was a tough one. I woke up happy but the dreary weather quickly put a damper on my mood. Katie and I walked to church but it just didn't feel right. Going to church felt right, but not going to my church didn't feel right, it didn't feel like home. I didn't have a delicious dinner to look forward to. All I could think of was my lean cuisine sitting in the freezer and how it would probably be the extent of my Easter dinner. Suddenly, I missed home the most since I've been here. I don't think you realize how valuable friends and family are on holidays until you don't have them there. Katie and I were going to go to an Easter art show but I was just not in an emotional state to go out. I sat in my room, feeling pretty lonely and depressed. I tried to nap but my mind wouldn't stop racing. Sweet Katie sent me a text saying she left something for me downstairs so once I mustered up the energy I headed down there. On every stair step there was a chocolate egg trailing to my makeshift Easter basket filled with an assortment of candy. It definitely brightened my mood but still didn't take away the loneliness I felt. After awhile I invited Katie back over and I made us some spaghetti and we watched Ratatouille. Though it didn't feel Easter-esque it was still enjoyable. When I woke up this morning and checked facebook, everyone's statuses were about Easter and all of a sudden it felt like Easter. Almost as if I couldn't celebrate Easter until my friends and family back home could too. So to me, today is Easter and I am definitely okay with that. I ate a chocolate bunny for breakfast and listened to some music to have my own little Easter celebration. One of the songs I listened to was "Your Love is Strong" by Jon Foreman and I ended up putting it on repeat. What a wonderful message. Thanks Jon, and thank you Jesus for your strong love and what you gave up for my sake.

Heavenly Father, you always amaze me
Let your kingdom come in my world and in my life
Give me the food I need to live through today and
Forgive me as I forgive the people that wrong me
Lead me far from temptation
Deliver me from the evil one

I look out the window the birds are composing
Not a note is out of tune or out of place
I walk to the meadow and stare at the flowers
Better dressed than any girl on her wedding day

So why do I worry?
Why do I freak out?
God knows what I need
You know what I need

Your love is
Your love is
Your love is strong

The kingdom of the heavens is now advancing
Invade my heart, invade this broken town
The kingdom of the Heavens is buried treasure
Would you sell yourself to buy the one you've found?

Two things you told me
That you are strong
And you love me
Yes, you love me

Your love is
Your love is
Your love is strong

Our God in Heaven
Hallowed be thy name
Above all names
Your kingdom come
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven
Give us today our daily bread
Forgive us weary sinners
Keep us far away from our vices
And deliver us from these prisons

2 weeks.

I can't even believe I leave in two weeks. My flight leaves Portland at 1 o'clock on February 10th. That is ridiculously soon! My mind has been very distracted the last few days due to my mom being extremely ill with meningitis and in the hospital. I'm pretty behind on packing and getting the things I need, but life happens and family is a priority. I'm so thankful for all the people who have been praying for my mom. I am a strong believer that prayer can be very powerful and I am so blessed with people in my life who are so willing to pray for my family. I think it made a big difference.

Despite the craziness that has been going on this week I have so much to be thankful for, especially financially. I was so concerned about money the beginning of December. No matter how I calculated it I kept coming up really short for the trip. I was so worried I wouldn't have enough money so I started working 60 hour weeks to try to make up the difference. But alas, God started pulling some strings and providing for me. The school in Australia (who refused to allow me to pay tuition in two payments) randomly sent me an email allowing me to do so, my scholarship pushed some money forward so I wouldn't arrive in Australia empty handed, and a couple amazingly generous people have surprised me with contributions to my trip. This just makes me realize how much I need to trust God and stop relying solely on myself. God won't necessarily provide for you directly, but he sure will indirectly, through other people.

Well, I'll be moving out of my apartment this weekend and then I have three more days left at work. I really like working at Fran's but it will be nice to move on. It's very bittersweet. I think I will miss the regular customers the most. I've worked there for two years and I've grown to love quite a few customers there. It'll be hard not seeing Craig and Janet on Monday nights, Cheryl most every night, talking to Bill while I make his ridiculously hot latte, seeing the cute couples that come in regularly, and all the other familiar, friendly faces that made working long shifts so much easier. I will also miss my girls so much. My co-worker, and good friend Eva is throwing me a going away party this Sunday which will be really fun. It'll be nice to have one last day with all the girls. I feel like time is running out so quickly and I have so many people I want to spend time with before I leave! I really hope I get to see everyone I want to see!

Confidence

Yesterday was a bad day that turned into a good night. I needed a dress for the New Years Eve party I was attending and much to my dismay... none of my dresses fit anymore. I guess you don't really realize weight gain that's very gradual but I could definitely tell yesterday. I made a trip to Ross to find an inexpensive dress and was nothing but disappointed. Nothing seemed to fit right and the dresses that did fit, didn't flatter me at all. I just felt like an overweight glob of grease. I popped into Maurices to see if I could find anything and I did find a dress that unfortunately was $44. I somehow justified buying it and made my way home. My mom called me and asked how I was and I just started crying. I told her how terrible I felt about my body and how mad I was at myself for letting myself gain weight. She reminded me that it's been a hard year for me and although it is quite the uphill battle, I can lose the weight. I felt a little better but still did not feel very great until I went to the party. I forgot about what had happened earlier and just had a good time. I was having a side conversation with a friend and I had mentioned my weight gain and how unhappy I was with my body. She proceeded to tell me that she didn't (nor did anyone else) even notice I gained weight because I was so confident with who I was. Although I don't feel very confident on the inside I know that I act like it on the outside. I guess it just got me thinking that confidence really is everything. Whether you act like you're just as good or not as good as every other person in that room, people truely believe it.

I found this quote and realized how true it is for me and so many people I know...

"Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are." -Malcolm S. Forbes

So... NEW YEARS RESOLUTION: To stop overvaluing what I'm not and stop undervaluing what I am.

It'll always be the Tim and Kelly show...

My best friend, Tim, moved to California this morning. After a night filled with pretty intense emotion and tears, I had to say goodbye to the best friend I've ever had. It's been about 23 hours since I last saw him and my heart is already starting to hurt. We did however have one incredibly awesome Tim/Kelly day. We went out to the dream, painted some pottery for each other, went to a movie, went to local boyz for dinner, went to Chip Ross Park to watch the sun set and stargaze, and of course watched FRIENDS. We had a blast and I'm so thankful we got to do all of that in one day before he left. I cannot even express how much this boy means to me. I've never had a friend love me so unconditionally and so selflessly. He's incredible and will never be replaced. I even remember him joking around with me when Greg and I started getting closer, saying that Greg was replacing him. I reminded him that he is entirely irreplaceable and it will ALWAYS be the Tim and Kelly show. =)

Abeet and Isget

I went over to my friend Chama's house the other day and got to spend time with her and her two of three children, Abbey and Isaac. Her kids are so unbelievably adorable. Everyone says she just needs to keep making babies because if they're that cute, she can't stop. They're sweet kids too. Pretty rambunctious, but still so very sweet. My favorite thing is that ever since Isaac was born, Abbey has always called him "Isget."And Isaac calls Abbey, "Abeet." =)

It's been too long...

It's been forever since I last blogged. Life has been crazy busy and chaotic. Between moving, vacationing to San Diego, doing housework, working, and trying to enjoy summer... I haven't found too much time to blog. But... I decided it was about time.

This beautiful girl is my good friend Emily. We've been friends for four years and I could not be more blessed by our friendship. She's been such a loving, understanding, and compassionate friend. I can talk to her about anything and never once has she been judgmental. She stands by me in whatever decision I make, even if she doesn't agree. She lets me make mistakes and helps me work through them. She's incredible and not only is she beautiful on the outside but probably one of the most beautiful people on the inside that I've ever known. I love you Emmy!

Beach!

I got to go home for five days this past glorious, sunny weekend. I had a lot of fun with some good friends (including Maradith, who I haven't hung out with in months!) We watched movies, had a BBQ for Greg's birthday, ate a lot of cheesecake =), and just spent a lot of time together. It was wonderful. On Monday Luke, Greg, Tim, and I headed to Agate Beach for the day. It was a perfect day to go to the beach. Other than my half sunburned body (thanks to the sunroof) and scraped up body from a nice fall, I had an awesome time. We just basked in the sun most of the day, cooked some brauts, ate some clam chowder at Mo's, and watched the sunset. It was a really good day =)




Can I just express how much I love these guys? They are possibly my favorite animal to watch. I honestly just want to curl up and cuddle with their fat, lazy bodies. I love them so much!

Grand Jeté

I have been taking a beginning ballet class this term and it has been a lot of fun. I took it to get some fun exercise and I have really been enjoying myself and getting super strong calves =). We were required to do a creative, no restrictions ballet project that was due this last Thursday. Since I bought that new camera I decided to take some pictures of my good friend Emily, dancing. Em loves to dance and is hoping to be a dance major. We had fun taking the photos and quite a few good laughs. I really appreciated her cooperation and willingness to help me out.

Here is my favorite shot of her doing a grand jeté. She makes it look so easy! And I also snapped a quick shot of my project before turning it in.

Fun Things Like Prom...

This evening I had a really fun opportunity to go to Kasey's house and photograph her brother before his junior prom. The sun was shining brightly but I was still able to get quite a few shots that weren't too terribly bright. These are a few of my favorite ones. I had a lot of fun and I adore the sweet family love in these photos.

A Good Day to Take a Walk

This afternoon Kasey and I went for a walk to Alton Baker park and spent some time by the river. It was so beautiful and warm out today! Thank God for that because the rain this last week has been getting me down. =( But today was glorious. =) Here are some of my favorite photos from today...